Teach me how to dance.

"I'll watch the night turn light blue
But it's not the same without you
Because it takes two to whisper quietly
The silence isn't so bad
Till I look at my hands and feel sad
'Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly."

Yea, it was fast. AND YES, I can't help but feel bad even on my birthday.
I've never shown my sisters and cousin this side of me, EVER, that I was weaker than they thought.
You've made me believe your illusions. Please stop playing with my heart.

But I know i'll be okay, someday.
I'll be a better person, I wont make the same mistakes I did with you.

I NEED TO SPEND TIME ON MY OWN. DROWN MYSELF IN MY TEARS. IT'S THE ONLY THING THAT SEEMS POSSIBLE.

Right now, I just want to feel like I matter. 
I want to be missed.
I want to be cared for.
I want to be truly loved.
And please, someone, prove to me that not all guys are the same.
SOMEONE PROVE ME WRONG.

I wish I were already at the point where i'm numb. Where I don't want to cry over it anymore.
Let's just pull the curtains down and leave.

I wish I could believe all the stuff you tell me. Where do I start from here? I'm back to zero and I'm never gonna be the same again.